Open chat / rip / Temprah 19 years ago

rip

i just need someplace to vent this, someplace to try and spill out everything that's in my head driving me crazy, don;t really have anyone to talk to about this so sorry y'all

Chessa Alexandria Marney-Wells
1987 - 2007
RIP

today i lost my baby and my dearest friend... she always was there for her mommy. kept me company when i was lonely, always knew when i needed her to come crawl into my lap when i was sad, hell she even helped me pick which guy to be with. she loved her daddy and really hated the other two guys i ever dated.. animals always know ya know. i'm not a pictures type of person, i don't have many at all of her that i know of which makes me so sad. i have a couple on my phone but i don't think i can handle seeing them right now.

is it sad that i screamed and cried more when i found her than i did when i lost any of my grandparents, or my uncle..? this whole time i have been getting ready for my trip i have had this.. this feeling, like something like this was going to happen that she would get sick or worse, but only when i was states away and couldn't be here with her.

i hate change, i despise it... i like my world to be safe, repetitive and comfortable. i feel like somebody just ripped out part of my soul. and i called my mom in my typical self delusional way thinking mommy would make everything ok and she just started the trite crap about living a long life and it was her time.. yadda yadda.. shit i really didn;t want to hear ya know? maybe in time i can believe that but right now.. no, right now i just want to have my baby back. but i can't. god how much can a person cry? i have these moments of numbness and i just hope they get longer.

ROzbeans 19 years ago

I know for a lot of people their pets are their children, so I'm sorry for your loss, Temp. =/ /hug

Den 19 years ago

*hugs*

Sorry :(

Verileah 19 years ago

:( I'm sorry for your loss, Temp. It's really very okay to grieve - there's no right or wrong when it comes to how you feel and I think every loss hits in its own way.

Tor 19 years ago

tamaelia 19 years ago

Aww Sweety :( I am so sorry your heart is breaking. Platitudes don't begin to approach the comfort you need right now. Just let the process of healing take its course and accept that you will be feeling volatile and hurt. I hope you find some solace in the support here and that you get some great big hugs IRL soon.

Temprah 19 years ago

thanks you guys.. X has been really really good to me but she was his baby girl for 15 years so i'm sure he's just as heartbroken as me.. he's just been trying to be strong and there for me, so i don't want to be burdening him too much. I was just feeling pretty lost yesterday. Well, I still am but it did seem to help me to just write all that out last night. And FW was so good to me, he sent me a link to a website that i've been reading over for pet grief =)

Darsa 19 years ago

Temprah, I'm so sorry; I know there's nothing I can say to make it feel better but please know that I feel your pain and I'm sending lotsa hugs your way :hug :hug :hug

Nards 19 years ago

I am very sorry. Just know that pets have no way to express how much they appreciate you other then the actions you mentioned she did.

Mylec 19 years ago

I'm sorry for your loss. As a fellow pet person, I can understand your grief. Time does heal all wounds though, and it will get a lil easier each day.

Sarah 19 years ago

Oh, Temp. I'm so sorry for your loss. Losing a pet is never ever easy. All I can offer is hugs and prayers.

:huggy

FyreGarnett 19 years ago

oh sweetie! lots of hugs coming your way! and since they're local, they might have a bit more punch?

jadephyre 19 years ago

i know how you must feel... i felt the same when both of my cats died :(

Sergon 19 years ago

Pets are family. I had to put down one dog and lost another last year. Im very sorry for your loss.

S

Slipnish 19 years ago

I'm a cat person. I love cats. We have 5. That's really about 4 more than we need, but what the hell...

Sorry to hear of your loss Temp, but I so totally understand. A couple of our "owners" are more like kids than our now older children are at this stage of development. (Teenagers. *shudder*)

Anywho, there really isn't much I can say, other than we just had a basket full o'kittens last night. 3 black and one stubborn genetic misanthrope who is determined to be orange of all things.

Mother is white/grey black stripe domestic and daddy is HUGE black tom. No idea where the orange is from, but it has been the cause of some pretty funky humor around here...

Anyways, sorry to ramble, but you know how us pet people are once you get us started...

Take your time. Grieve. Time does heal all wounds, it just sucks that it takes so damn long to get around to it.

Big hugs from Estaban, who is, in reality, A Great Lover of Kitty-Cats... Heh...and, of course...womens. LOL!