Restaurant Takes on Rowdy Kids
http://www.abcnews.go.com/2020/story?id=2971198&page=1
Restaurant Takes On Rowdy Kids
Should Parents Have to Leave Children Home When Dining Out?
By JOHN STOSSEL and CHRISTOPHER ST. JOHN
March 22, 2007  - Have you ever found yourself counting the seconds until your check arrives at a restaurant? Not because the food, service or ambience were lacking, but because someone's child was running laps around the place, hiding under the tables, and practicing his dinosaur roar at ear-splitting volume.
Or maybe you've been on the other side, out to a family meal with the kids, proud of their behavior -- which in any other situation might be called exemplary -- only to be berated by a fellow diner who believes that children "should be seen and not heard"?
Either way, the moment probably doesn't rank among your top ten dining experiences. Whether they're well-behaved kids bored of waiting for their grilled cheese to arrive or poor-mannered brats hell-bent on ruining a meal for everyone within screaming distance, the friction created by kids in restaurants is something many of us have experienced.
In one Chicago community these tensions reached a boiling point when Dan McCauley, owner of a local cafe, A Taste of Heaven, decided he had had enough of children using his establishment as a playground.
Heaven and Hell
One afternoon, McCauley said, he caught a pair of kids scaling the walls of his restaurant while their parents sat nearby. As the group was leaving, McCauley confronted Julie, one of the supervising mothers, and told her that she and her children were no longer welcome in the cafe.
"I was so shocked," said Julie, who out of concern for the children's anonymity asked that her last name not be used. "It made me feel like I was in the second grade, having my knuckles whacked or something."
The following morning McCauley posted a sign on the front door, thinking it would be a simple solution. It read: "Children of all ages have to behave and use their indoor voices when coming to A Taste of Heaven"
To his astonishment, the sign quickly provoked a strong response within the community. "We had like 50 or 60 phone calls," McCauley said. "People stating that they were really offended, and they would never step foot in here again, which really surprised me." A local newspaper even wrote that a group of concerned parents was going to boycott the cafe.
The Debate Changes
But then things began to change, when the story was picked up outside of the community and reported nationally. All of a sudden, McCauley said, the steady stream of angry phone calls turned into a tidal wave of support.
Letters applauding the restaurant's stand against rowdy kids began to arrive from around the country, some from as far away as Singapore and the United Kingdom. McCauley even received some small checks from supporters worried he would lose business.
The story reflects a debate that has long been simmering in online chat rooms and letters to local newspapers: How should children be expected to behave in public places, and especially in restaurants? Disciplinarians, advocates of hands-off child rearing, the childless, and mothers of six all seem to have an opinion.
The point of contention is rarely whether or not children should be allowed in restaurants, or whether or not they should behave. Most agree that kids are welcome to dine out as long as they don't make nuisances of themselves. But tempers seem to flare when the topic is addressed in public.
'It's Like Speaking Against Nuns'
Ralph, the husband of Julie and father of the children banned from A Taste of Heaven, said that while it was hard not to agree with McCauley, "What I'm saying is that there are ways to approach this issue without making parents feel uncomfortable, patronized, pushed away."
Meanwhile, Ted, a Taste of Heaven patron who gave only his first name, had his own theory to explain the nation-wide debate touched off by the cafe's sign.
"It was kinda groundbreaking," he said. "It's almost taboo. Children definitely are the one thing that you cannot speak against in our society. They are innately good. It's like speaking against nuns. You know what I mean?"
I'll formulate an opinion on the drive home.
jadephyre
18 years ago
if i had my own restaurant and kids would run wild i would do the same thing, and i would give a f**k if people complain... if they can't get their offspring under control then they should stay at home...
Verileah
18 years ago
What bothers me is that the definitions for 'running wild' seem to range from the children 'being present' to 'climbing up the walls'. Everyone has their own interpretation and of course *wry smile* we parents all think we have our children observe some standard of good behavior in public.
Vulash
18 years ago
He messed up sayign kids. The sign should ahve said "all persons entering will behave, and act in a manner that isn't overly disturbing or be asked to leave". Rowdy kids aren't the only issue in restaurants - adults get out of control as well.
However, it does need to be excessive distrubance.
However, it does need to be excessive distrubance.
Sabby
18 years ago
My kids can be royal brats. Complete and utter total pains in the ass. However, I rarely ever have to ask them to chill out or threaten to leave a place with them, because all their misbehaving happens to be at home. So many people also come up to me to tell me I have some of the most well behaved kids they've seen in public. (8, 6, & 4).
I agree with Verity here, I believe it is because of two things. Before we go places I usually set between 1 & 3 rules (the fewer the better). If these rules are broken, we leave. (no ifs, ands, or buts). We just leave. And the second one is, what Verity said, I actually color and draw with them, or talk to them. It is when you try and ignore them that they start acting like little shits, IMO.
ALL of my kids have tested the limits. And ALL of them have gotten into trouble. However, 90% of the time they act very very well in public.
-Sabby
P.S. When I do see a kid fall out on the floor at any store. I wait until we are out of ear shot, and I ask my kids... What would happen to you if you did that? They know they'd be grounded, leave immediately, and any other mean thing I can think of at the time.
I agree with Verity here, I believe it is because of two things. Before we go places I usually set between 1 & 3 rules (the fewer the better). If these rules are broken, we leave. (no ifs, ands, or buts). We just leave. And the second one is, what Verity said, I actually color and draw with them, or talk to them. It is when you try and ignore them that they start acting like little shits, IMO.
ALL of my kids have tested the limits. And ALL of them have gotten into trouble. However, 90% of the time they act very very well in public.
-Sabby
P.S. When I do see a kid fall out on the floor at any store. I wait until we are out of ear shot, and I ask my kids... What would happen to you if you did that? They know they'd be grounded, leave immediately, and any other mean thing I can think of at the time.
Linus
18 years ago
As a parent, I have to say... You know if your kids behavior sucks, you KNOW! If it does, spare those who don't want to hear your kid screaming and going on and running all over the place. When I was a kid, I would have gotten my ass beat, and im not advocating that, but thats what would have happened. I'm a step parent I don't have ass beating priveleges, but the kids know not to piss me off(and ive never even yelled at them) by my tone of voice and that I don't give in just because they start to whine. That said, this past valentines day, FREAKING VALENTINES DAY. We went to a very nice restaurant only to have the experience ruined by the fact that there were at least 10 children running around being assholes. So again, you know if your kid is a disaster in public and chances are, its your fault they are, so please spare us.