ROUND 1 - Almonds are yummy! (SERIAL KILL)


Not near as good as his salted crisps, but salted just the same. Jeremy Clarkson dipped his hand into the bag of almonds and deposited three or four of them into his mouth at a time. Chewing them happily, he relished the nuts as his stomach grumbled from finishing off his crisps earlier. How could he have a full stomach after witnessing the two murders, especially the last one? A strong disposition and British gumption, that’s how!

‘Or… braggadocio, cheekiness, or chutzpah!’ For the hell of it, he did his best eastern speak as he looked down his nose and guffawed quite believably, until he began to choke on the almonds.

‘Oh…’ he gasped, ‘…bulloacksssss.’

Suddenly two arms wrapped around him and a fist nestled neatly below his breastbone and tightened around him with a sudden jerk. The offending almond flew out of his mouth and across the room, bouncing off the far wall of another snack room.

‘You should stick to something less yeasty. I saw some flatbread in that other snack room?’
‘Oh no, I’d rather have something rather bad for me.’ He cleared his throat and nodded, thanking the stranger. ‘Appreciate the help.’

Jeremy smiled as the person peered at him with somewhat envious eyes. He held out the almonds and offered them, but the stranger still declined.

‘Right then. Where are the others?’

‘Looking after that young lady and Agent, last I saw.’

‘Oh, right. Ghastly business.’ Jeremy made a face and wiped his hands clean. ‘I wager it has something to do with the lock down.’ The stranger raised an eyebrow, listening intently, prompting Jeremy to continue with his ridiculous theory.

‘What if it’s a type of…oh I don’t know…mad cow disease? Or a…a rage virus like 28 days later? Yeah…’ Jeremy considered the rage virus; it could be possible, couldn’t it? What a story that would make. While deep in thought, he grabbed the almonds again and began shoveling them into his mouth, enjoying the salty taste.

‘Wouldn’t that be funny though,’ he asked the stranger, ‘death by angry virus? Although that woman…that was an accident for the most part, caused by that angry mob.’

Jeremy snapped his fingers.

‘There it is again – angry people, so I guess it does count! Death by angry accident!’

Jeremy began to laugh, encouraged by the stranger’s agreement, and they laughed together until another almond lodged itself squarely in his windpipe, causing him to gasped for air. With large eyes he began pointing at his throat again, wheezing for breath as the stranger just watched.


‘No, I don’t think so,’ the stranger replied politely.

Jeremy scratched as his throat, his knees buckling under him, closer to the stranger who stepped back and away. He reached out and knocked over a gilded dish, shattering as it hit the ground. Fighting for air, he tried to cough up the almond, dislodging it on his own finally as he bent over and placed his hands on the ground, sucking in the fresh, clean air.

‘No, that just won’t do.’ Pulling on the microwave on the counter, the stranger dropped the microwave on Mr. Clarkson’s head, crushing it with its weight. The stranger waited through the twitching until the annoying British man was finally dead.

With a quick wipe on the counter, the stranger righted the bag of almonds that had tipped over and laid the towel in the middle section of the double stainless steel sink. Stepping over the dead man, the stranger exited, closing the door behind them.

Luc and Alex watched from their perch on the snack room’s table as a lone individual murdered Jeremy Clarkson. Crossing His arms He snorted and then looked at Luc who was glaring at Him.


‘What was that?’

Alec shrugged, ‘What was what? What, that?’ Pointing after the stranger, he added, ‘I thought that was you.’

‘Me,’ Luc said in a monotone voice.

‘Yes, you. I didn’t do that.’

Luc turned his head and gave Alex a side look.

‘Honest injun,’ Alex said with a laugh. ‘I’d take credit for a lone gun, but that wasn’t me.’

‘Go…geez,’ Luc started. ‘Does that one have free will?’


‘Oh don’t be all happy about it. That kind of throws things off, doesn’t it?’

‘I think it says volumes for them.’

‘They’re talking apes, which, I’d like to remind you, was the best you could do.’

Alex’s smile slowly fell from his face. ‘No, Luc, you were the best I could do.’ His voice was quiet but each word was clear and concise. ‘You let jealousy get in the way.’

Luc swallowed slowly and lowered his head.

Alex straightened off the table and pulled at the cuffs under his black Armani sleeves. ‘Let’s let it run, see how it goes.’

‘But what if they win,’ Luc chimed in, having found his back bone again.

‘Well, let’s burn that bridge when we get to it?’

‘Fine,’ Luc muttered.


ROzbeans 13 years ago