how many babies is too many babies?
a good friend of mine insists that she wants to have four children. I'm an only child, and that seems like way too many to me.
just from a financial point of view, that's a disaster for an average couple, isn't it? I mean, Smith College is about 40k/year now, so in 20 years, that's going to be well over $100k/year. $400k * 4 = 1.6million, and that's JUST college. the cost of raising that many children is going to be outrageous as well.
financial matters aside, how can you raise four children properly? I really don't know. I think I could handle two kids, but four seems like a handful.
anyone have a lot of kids?
ROzbeans
20 years ago
He is the potential daddy. /grin
Dia
20 years ago
in that case! hell ya you can argue it!
Draegloth
20 years ago
you can stop there...
:o
Dia
unless your having babies with her
you can stop there...
:o
Gilae
20 years ago
If the woman has never experienced the so called 'joy' of pregnancy, she may decide after number 1 that she's done.
It is decidedly NOT what most women think they're signing up for.
It is decidedly NOT what most women think they're signing up for.
Draegloth
20 years ago
/pray
Vex
20 years ago
kids are little spawns of satan... i dont care if you arent christian, im not either.. but they are just like him!
so 1 is too many.
so 1 is too many.
Anulien
20 years ago
All kids are not college bound and lying to them is wrong. Encouraging children in large families that things like trades or military as a career is beneficial rather than setting them up for massive failure through high school/community college. This world needs more welders and electricians and forklift operators and bullet catchers. Plan to raise a kid to be a cook rather than a scientist and I think things make themselves a bit easier financially.
It would be a handful if you pop them out to close to each other or end up with twins. Spacing them out a few 4-5 years apart and they slowly start to help raise each other. But then you are screwed for the next 30 years of trying to get kids to move out and leave you alone. The only advantage I see is there are 4 chances of being supported when you turn into a decaying old person.
0 kids is ok with me though.
Draegloth
just from a financial point of view, that's a disaster for an average couple, isn't it? I mean, Smith College is about 40k/year now, so in 20 years, that's going to be well over $100k/year. $400k * 4 = 1.6million, and that's JUST college. the cost of raising that many children is going to be outrageous as well.
All kids are not college bound and lying to them is wrong. Encouraging children in large families that things like trades or military as a career is beneficial rather than setting them up for massive failure through high school/community college. This world needs more welders and electricians and forklift operators and bullet catchers. Plan to raise a kid to be a cook rather than a scientist and I think things make themselves a bit easier financially.
financial matters aside, how can you raise four children properly? I really don't know. I think I could handle two kids, but four seems like a handful.
It would be a handful if you pop them out to close to each other or end up with twins. Spacing them out a few 4-5 years apart and they slowly start to help raise each other. But then you are screwed for the next 30 years of trying to get kids to move out and leave you alone. The only advantage I see is there are 4 chances of being supported when you turn into a decaying old person.
0 kids is ok with me though.
Draegloth
20 years ago
Can anyone that knows me actually assume that any of my children wouldn't be college material?
Trades? no. the world may need ditch diggers, too, but let someone else spawn them.
Military? sure, but only as a precursor to college.
The girl in question is a teacher and has a degree in psychology. I'm the smartest person I've ever met. If my children don't go to college, it will be because they don't want to, NOT because I haven't encouraged them to.
I'm not interested in churning out a whole clan worth of offspring. Two kids works for me, and I actually got her to admit that four would probably be too much and two would be fine, so I win.
Anulien
All kids are not college bound and lying to them is wrong. Encouraging children in large families that things like trades or military as a career is beneficial rather than setting them up for massive failure through high school/community college. This world needs more welders and electricians and forklift operators and bullet catchers. Plan to raise a kid to be a cook rather than a scientist and I think things make themselves a bit easier financially.
Can anyone that knows me actually assume that any of my children wouldn't be college material?
Trades? no. the world may need ditch diggers, too, but let someone else spawn them.
Military? sure, but only as a precursor to college.
The girl in question is a teacher and has a degree in psychology. I'm the smartest person I've ever met. If my children don't go to college, it will be because they don't want to, NOT because I haven't encouraged them to.
Anulien
It would be a handful if you pop them out to close to each other or end up with twins. Spacing them out a few 4-5 years apart and they slowly start to help raise each other. But then you are screwed for the next 30 years of trying to get kids to move out and leave you alone. The only advantage I see is there are 4 chances of being supported when you turn into a decaying old person.
0 kids is ok with me though.
I'm not interested in churning out a whole clan worth of offspring. Two kids works for me, and I actually got her to admit that four would probably be too much and two would be fine, so I win.
Vulash
20 years ago
I'm country and family oriented, so I'm biased - but I'm glad I come from a decent size family and have lots of cousins - our family get togethers mean more to me then anything else I can think of and I'm very prideful of my family. We weren't very well off growing up, and had it rather rough to say the least - but lookign back I wouldn't trade it for a comfortable life with the family - and I think something about that made us closer and appreciative too.
Draegloth
20 years ago
thank you, Mr. Carlin.
Xandare
I say none.. kids are over rated.. and besides, most of them are rather unpleasent to be around. My sister has 6 children, the family DNA is doing just fine without my help.
thank you, Mr. Carlin.
Guest
20 years ago
Xandare
I say none.. kids are overrated.. and besides, most of them are rather unpleasant to be around.
Hijinks
20 years ago
My parents raised me right. They taught me to be polite, caring, kind, generous, and patient. I did well in high school (although not as well as I could have, I was just to lazy to take AP courses). My folks got divorced when I was 15. My mother stole my college fund (about $5k) while I was overseas. Even so, it wouldn't have been enough to pay for the college I went to. There just wasn't any financial help available from my divorced parents to pay for my school. I did it with financial aid and loans and good-grade-grants.
I remember watching Dawson's Creek and the Katie Holmes character was whining horribly about losing a scholarship and she REALLY didn't want to take out loans for college and oh, god, how was she ever going to get schooling. I stopped watching the show after that.
I busted my ass working 2 jobs and going to school part-time until I got my AA, then worked as a security guard and got financial aid/loans while I finished my BA full-time. It IS possible for someone to go to a good college and pay for it themselves.
If/when I have children, I will certainly do my best to save some money for their college, and I will hope that they will go to college. If what I save isn't enough, I will expect them to have jobs and get financial aid and grants and loans to pay the rest.
But then, my kids will probably have jobs while in high school, and they're damn well going to be doing chores at home - my kids will have a good work ethic and will do their best at whatever they choose to do, whether it's go to college - med school - grad school - whatever, or whether it's graduate from high school and go to New York and be an artist, or whether it's a trade school or the military after high school. What my children choose for their lives is based on what THEY want, not what I want. Sure, I'd love for them to go to college, but college is not for everyone. Point blank.
I am an intelligent woman and I hope that my children will be very smart as well, and book-readers like me, and creative artist types like me, but I may get dumb jock kids who are more brawn than brain and decide to play professional football. It's a toss-up what you get when you plan for kids. I don't think the person who suggested a trade school for your future children was trying to insult you.
If, god forbid, you have a child with Down's Syndrome, would you love that child any less because he or she would never go to college. I doubt it. You can plan for your kids to be mensa members all you want, but I fear your reality will be different, and you'll be disappointed unless you allow the possibility of less intelligent (or driven in a different direction) children into your head and accept it.
I'd be remiss in my "duties" as a parent if I didn't have the means to provide for them in every aspect.
My parents raised me right. They taught me to be polite, caring, kind, generous, and patient. I did well in high school (although not as well as I could have, I was just to lazy to take AP courses). My folks got divorced when I was 15. My mother stole my college fund (about $5k) while I was overseas. Even so, it wouldn't have been enough to pay for the college I went to. There just wasn't any financial help available from my divorced parents to pay for my school. I did it with financial aid and loans and good-grade-grants.
I remember watching Dawson's Creek and the Katie Holmes character was whining horribly about losing a scholarship and she REALLY didn't want to take out loans for college and oh, god, how was she ever going to get schooling. I stopped watching the show after that.
I busted my ass working 2 jobs and going to school part-time until I got my AA, then worked as a security guard and got financial aid/loans while I finished my BA full-time. It IS possible for someone to go to a good college and pay for it themselves.
If/when I have children, I will certainly do my best to save some money for their college, and I will hope that they will go to college. If what I save isn't enough, I will expect them to have jobs and get financial aid and grants and loans to pay the rest.
But then, my kids will probably have jobs while in high school, and they're damn well going to be doing chores at home - my kids will have a good work ethic and will do their best at whatever they choose to do, whether it's go to college - med school - grad school - whatever, or whether it's graduate from high school and go to New York and be an artist, or whether it's a trade school or the military after high school. What my children choose for their lives is based on what THEY want, not what I want. Sure, I'd love for them to go to college, but college is not for everyone. Point blank.
Can anyone that knows me actually assume that any of my children wouldn't be college material?
I am an intelligent woman and I hope that my children will be very smart as well, and book-readers like me, and creative artist types like me, but I may get dumb jock kids who are more brawn than brain and decide to play professional football. It's a toss-up what you get when you plan for kids. I don't think the person who suggested a trade school for your future children was trying to insult you.
If, god forbid, you have a child with Down's Syndrome, would you love that child any less because he or she would never go to college. I doubt it. You can plan for your kids to be mensa members all you want, but I fear your reality will be different, and you'll be disappointed unless you allow the possibility of less intelligent (or driven in a different direction) children into your head and accept it.