Open chat / Sh9T my dad says... / ROzbeans 16 years ago

Sh9T my dad says...

Twitter account - I almost pee'd my pants.

http://twitter.com/shitmydadsays

Verileah 16 years ago
Jesus Christ that's funny.
ROzbeans 16 years ago
texts from last night is even funnier. I've been giggling for the past 20 mins.
Lessa 16 years ago
thats hilarious
Laschae 16 years ago
Ahaha these are funny as hell!

Sadly some dude on my facebook keeps posting this shit like he made it up. Wonder if I could call him out....:decisions
tamaelia 16 years ago
ROFL awesome find Roz :D
ROzbeans 16 years ago
(815): We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
(847): And they lived happily ever after....


ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Verileah 16 years ago
Yeah, for me the shit my dad says is funnier. I like my wit crude and ornery I guess :D.
ROzbeans 16 years ago
(214): Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.

HAHAHAHAHA
ROzbeans 16 years ago
(215): two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
(1-215): ill bring the camera dont start without me
Lillyanna-Windmane 16 years ago
This shit is killer, some of it renders you to tears. LOL

(314): I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.

(561): he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd

(415): So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Vulash 16 years ago
(404): I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
(812): I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Lessa 16 years ago
(215): i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section

haha!
ROzbeans 16 years ago
(519): We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
(1-519): I'm down.
ROzbeans 16 years ago
(631): im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
ROzbeans 16 years ago
(717): Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
(1-717): Haha how do you remember that?
(717): HOW COULD I FORGET?!
ROzbeans 16 years ago
(801): I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
ROzbeans 16 years ago
(989): News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
(1-989): Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
ROzbeans 16 years ago
(973): Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back

I laughed so loud I snorted.
ROzbeans 16 years ago
These are just too funny.

(314): doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
(504): I'm out of practice. be my yoda
(314): put your penis in her you must.