What kind of character are/were you?

The Average Raider
Chances are you fit into this category. He logs when needed, is fairly adaptive to the raid, pays decent attention, fufills his class role adequately, and doesn't cause too many problems.

The Pessimist
This dude always sees the worst in things. He'll say things in guildchat like "[Main Tank] is at 90%, it's a wipe" and means it. If your group wipes at all, no matter how preventable it was, he'll either leave the raid or complain that it's going to be "a long night." Even after successes, this guy will say stuff like, "that was really sloppy, we almost didn't make it."

The Optimist
Arch-nemesis of the pessemist, the optimist will see the silver-lining in everything. Expect to hear things like "That was a great attempt! We got Hatchett all the way to 29%!" and "All we need to do is keep the MTs up, do more dps, stop dying, and we've got this." Even if your raid is absolute shit that day, The Optimist will celebrate all accomplishments.

The Cusser
Swears profusely about everything. And I mean EVERYTHING. He'll swear when your group is idle on the initial pull. This dude can be very funny, especially if he has an accent. He's almost always drunk and will usually tell you he's drunk multiple times.

The Clown
Provides good entertainment for your guild. Does impressions, tells jokes, sings/raps, plays sound clips... you name it, this guy does it in guildchat. His main flaw is that he will do this at the worst times, including in the middle of boss fights. This guy can overlap quite easily with The Cusser.

The Fuckup
Damn, I hate this guy. Every time you wipe he will immediately try and blame someone and/or anyone. If he makes a mistake, he'll come up with some BS excuse for it ("I lagged on OMM, that's why I missed the click!", etc.) At least one wipe he will claim that it was your class that caused it, even when it was probably his class too. He's probably buddies with at least one officer, if not an officer himself. Tends to overlap with The Pessimist.

The Princess
NOTE: This does not describe all female players, only a certain breed of them.
The Princess will flirt with everyone, and I mean EVERYONE. She almost always gets loot over people with more dkp, due to either her flirting with all the people above her or a "slip-up" by the Master-Looter. If she's decent-looking, everyone knows what her Myspace is. If she isn't decent-looking, she'll pretend she is. She probably talks in a really high-pitched voice. She knows at least one other raider in RL and will defend him on any issue no matter what; the whole raid will probably start taking his side too to suck up to The Princess.

The Panicker
Mid-battle will start screaming about anything that happens to him or to the raid in general. Usually the shit he complains about isn't anything worth worrying about.

The DKP whore
Hordes his dkp like mad and try to talk you out of any loot drop. Amazingly, tends to have more dkp and less items than anyone in the raid, somehow. Won't spend points on HUGE needed upgrades cuz something better might come along and can't understand why everyone else doesn't see things the same way.

The AFK guy
Is AFK during EVERYTHING. He's rarely heard in guildchat even if he is at his keyboard, and he usually isn't. Typically places himself on Follow to avoid people noticing. He's usually there in time for boss fights but will probably alt+tab again after the fight is done and loot has been distributed. When confronted on his bad AFK, he'll come up with an excuse ("Someone's at the door, Lag, I had to pee").

The Noble Passer
Will pass on everything they can use, even if it's a big upgrade for them, because "someone else can use it more." Takes the combined efforts of the entire guild to get them to take an item

The Quiet Guy
Never talks on guildchat or on the messageboards, ever. If he has a keyboard, it's probably dusty as hell. When he does finally post something, its so funny/relevant that you'll wonder why he doesn't more often.

The Loot Whiner
Complains often that he never gets loot. Usually tries to use a pathetic appeal to get other people in his group/raid/class/whatever to pass on items he wants. Is usually well-geared despite what what he presents. Will go in on EVERYTHING without scruples, usually getting them because no one wanted, and usually has the lowest dkp in the raid.

The Guy That Talks Too Goddamn Much
Can't ever control his volume in Guildchat, Messageboards or Ventrilo. Good, Bad, whatever the situation is he's typing or posting about it. Every board thread has 3 - 15 replies from this guy and guildchat is ablaze with things IN CAPS from him.

The Activist
Tries to look out for the guild, at the expense of a few of the guild members. If he's not the raid leader or guild leader/officer, he'll almost certainly be hated. Will try and end any argument that pops up in your guildchat, frequently with threats that he can hopefully back up. Hates wasting time, off topics and will generally get pissed every time your raid wipes or has any other delay at all. Gets very impatient on loot and will occasionally force it on people if there is enough of a problem. May try to be inspirational, trying to push the raid onto the next boss, but can get frustrated faily easily and will insult the raid into movement if needed. Tends to hang with only a few people in the guild, most likely other officers. This character tends to hate The Cusser or The Clown.

The Complainer
Complains about everything possible. Not really an asshole or a jerk - just that whenever something goes wrong to this person, they complain about it. "WOW will someone get this fucking mob off me? I can't do my damn job when the tanks aren't doing theirs." or "Nice lag tonight Sony. Oh wait that's every night. Screw DemiPlane, I'm tired of this laggy shit." If this character is not very good and/or dies a lot, he can be extremely annoying.

The Attention Junkie
During raids especially, when the most people trying to pay attention, will start talking about his personal life like we really care that much. Will bring up real life issues when we're in the middle of something and people just aren't interested. Usually he'll keep at it until someone pays some kind of attention to him. Example: "Man it sucks that I have to be at this raid tonight, cause I'm pretty depressed since my girlfriend just broke up with me. Apparently she fell for some guy who just got out of prison for sexual assault. I don't know what's up with her, but I think I'm gonna go pour rice into her carburetor after we down Jelvan. Oh and tomorrow I can't come to DemiPlane, I have an appointment with my psychologist. I punched my sister yesterday so my mom's making me see one." Usually people just don't respond, but you can just tell they're dying for the attention. The Princess usually falls into this category.

Armchair Raid Leader
Is quiet most of the time but when an encounter gives the raid trouble, he is quick to suggest a million impractical and poorly thought out strategies which he considers to be foolproof. Doesn't do his homework and sadly no one pays attention to him and he will never actually lead a raid.

The Dictator
Nines times our of ten, the Dictator plays the role of guild leader. If he is not guild leader, he be found as the guild's raid leader. Basicly he is the one that gives all the orders during a raid. Prefers to take away channel privilages from everyone else in the raid, besides those he trusts, aka his right hand man, his cronies, and the MT. Creates a seperate channel for healers to speak to each other so he can ignore them but they can still hear him. Does not allow anyone to type in raid unless it is constructive. Instead a /join channel is used for all the worker bees to talk. He dictates every aspect of loot, forcing loot down the throats of passers, and denying it from Loot whores that will use it once in a blue moon. If you dont like the way he does something, you have no room to speak, because he knows all, and in most cases he does know all. You fear to even cross his path because his 6-7 cronies that follow him as their leader would do anything to protect him. The dictator tells you what to do, 53 follow. Raiding is treated like a chore with him. Overlaps heavily with The Activist but never does things as nicely.

The Late Guy
Shows up late to everything without notice. If invites are 6pm, he shows up at 9pm asking for an invite. Often demands full dkp for the time he missed.

The Updater
Tells you everything about the current fight every three seconds. "OMM at 96%... I'm out of mana, ... tank low health, heal... OMM at 85%!" Tends to be a healer, and if not he gets ignored really quickly.

He of 1,000 alts
This person has a level 70 of every class... sometimes two. He or she may be willing to switch to benefit the raid, but the downsides are that: 1) None of those characters are particularly well-geared and 2) He or she often forgets which character he or she is currently playing. This can leads to all kinds of hilarity... and wipes. If your guild has more than one raid, he will insist that one of his alts gets placed in the second raid over other peoples' mains.

The Pretender
While not a great leader, does his best to lead his raid through. He (and probably his whole raid) is probably a joke to the other guilds. Usually finds a good excuse to pick up loot over others. Has little to no raiding experience despite loud claims to the contrary.

The Tired One
Signs up/Comes to every raid he or she can, and then leaves sometime within the first two bosses because they're too tired and they've worked all day and have to work tomorrow. Can be a real pain if he/she does not give notice.

The New Guy
Even though he plays his class well he is constantly sending tells to his class leader and raid leader "How am I doing" "was that my fault" "I know I am new but..". Rarely speaks in raid chat but when he does its usually several lines of text recounting every raid he has been on and every guild he has been in. Apologizes for every little thing and constantly thanks the guild for inviting him and taking him.

The Under-Confident Raid leader
This guy waits for a full raid before the first pull. Will often call a raid if somone leaves citing the reason as "not enough people." When a wipe occurs blames himself and only himself. Is very cautious on everything and will often tell the raid to wait for 5 sunders on trash mobs.

The Bomb
You won't know he's in your raid until he explodes. He may get into a few minor conflicts in the guild/raid but probably won't be suspected of anything. When he's pushed too far, he will wipe the raid outright, LD, or totally go off on the messageboard and deguild. Rarely gets into a different guild/raid.

The Inflamer
Will bring up controversial societal issues and inflame people on purpose. People used to him get a good laugh, new raiders will sometimes be offended/confused. Can be extremely radical ("All drugs should be legalized!") or just moderately controversial ("George W. Bush is the greatest/worst President ever!").

The Impatient Puller
The IP wants no downtime on the run. Will pull the next group of mobs when the healers/ casters are out of mana and medding up. This is usually a melee class. Contradicting his need for speed, he will be first to complain about how fast loot is being called and will pull before loot is finished.

The Gossip Queen
Speaks mostly in /tells to many people in the raid. He/she knows all the drama going on between the members of the guild and frequently will talk behind the back of people he/she doesn't like. Is known to cause a lot of drama to win loot with his "he said, she said" tactics. Is also known for the occasional very hilarious and sometimes embarrasing mistell in raid chat like, "Yeah I can't believe that cybered last night."

The Pervert
Makes a sexual reference about anything and everything in guildchat. Usually pretends to be gay with another member of the guild just to get a rise out of the homophobes. Anything with sex in it and he is there! Overlaps with The Clown.

The "Pro/Pretender"
He's been to this boss fight -- tons of times. In fact, on his alt, he has killed this boss and got the best loot from him. No matter the situation, the pretender will most likely have done it, better, on his other server alt, but why he's playing this one is beyond you. 90% of his information is also incorrect about raid encounters ("In my guild, we all stand in a ring around OMM, and ranged DPS him... That's how you kill him. Wanna try that?") When pressed about the guild and server, he wavers and gets vague and then LDs.


Mr. 4Chan/Ytmnd/EQLive.com Forums
Thinks every internet fad they've ever seen or heard about is the most hilarious thing in the universe, and has to share it with the Raid. He has a massive amount of internet knowledge, has millions of pictures, and can bring up any oft-repeated phrase for hours at a time for no reason. He's sometimes funny, but the humor wears thin the 90th time you've said a raid command in /rs and he's /yell'd back, ' O RLY? '

CAPS
Doesn't use the messageboard but loves guildchat and /raidchat, and always types in full capital letters. Often times wants attention, but rarely gets it.

The Little Brother
A clearly immature player who has recently dinged 70 and now fully expects to be invited to raids. Fills raid chat with "Oh, I hope that drops tonight!" and instantly states " item!" on every drop. Seems put off when loot goes to others instead of him. Youthfully enthusiastic, he tries to organize raid runs and strategies independently of the RL, rarely with any success.

The Just-In-Timer
While others are assembling or parking their toons for a scheduled run, these players are grinding in The Nest/Walls of Slaughter until the last possible moment. Usually ask for summons too. Insists it's the mages' job to CoH him rather than his own job to get to the instance.

The Independent Spirit
A player who refuses to gear appropriately or fill a raid role. Goes nuts when someone criticizes their AAs, playstyle, or refusal to heal/tank/CC/whatever, usually with the phrase "Don't f-----g tell me how I should play. I pay $15 a month and I'll do whatever I want."

The Lousy Off-Tank
Why this guy is your backup is beyond you. He has maybe 2200AC, if that. He hasn't grasped the concept of "Defensive." Yet he is always called upon by your to get that spare add during a fight. Every time an high aggro weapon drops, expect him to make loud noises to get this item.

The ADD Kid
This guy is annoying as hell. His skills in the game could break a EQ record low, and pretty much everything he says is off-topic to the raid. Almost always tries to be a Clown and usually is. If you can get this guy mad enough, you'll have entertainment for weeks (though he'll turn Bomb quickly and then beg for a re-invite the next day).

The Gender-Bender
Most often found in male players, this person plays a character of the opposite gender from thier own, and gets really hot under the collar if you use the same gender pronoun for both. What they usually fail to realize is that people only tease them becasue they get so irate about it. If they'd just let is drop, no one would care anymore.

The Idiot Typer
This player slaughters the English language every chance he gets. Fragments, run-on sentences, numbers 4 words or 13773rs, no punctuation or awful use of it, Yoda-like sentence structure, or worse. You may not be a grammar-fascist but after seeing this character speak, you'll feel a strong urge temporarily.

The Good Back-up
Man, this guy is awesome. You love taking him, he's so much fun to be around, he plays his class like no other, he rarely if ever whines about loot, he's online and at the zone right on time for invites (without being reminded in advance)... He's 100x better than whoever he replaced, making you want to bring him every time even if it means dropping the regular guy.

The BAD Back-up
Man, this guy is terrible. You hate taking him, he's a Pessimist/@$%!@%&/Loot-!@!#&, he doesn't know how to turn attack on, he constantly begs for loot, he shows up 30 minutes late from his AV game... He's 100x worse than whoever he replaced, making you want to beat the regular guy over the head with a stick for not showing up. The Bad Back-up will bother you all week asking if he has a spot; the best way to handle one is to claim you're full on his class, even if you're horribly lacking.

The Perfectionist
The guy who has EVERYTHING. No, really. Full Anguish and DemiPlane armor sets, six different weapons, both epics, maxxed out tradeskills, and he's allied with every faction in the game. This is probably his only character and he certainly doesn't have a job or social life, but man does his character sparkle. Is usually quite good at what he does.

The Victim
Quietly claims to hate everything about the EQ endgame: zones, instance timers, guilds, dkp. Except for loot, which he apparently wants so badly that he will stomach "the system" if it means upgrades. Plays well, but privately ignores raidchat and ignores other guildies for EVERYTHING. Insists on paying guild members for trade items so as not to feel beholden. If there were groupable epics/raid level armor, you are certain you'd never see this player in a raid again.

The Poor Dude
There's always at least one of him. Never has any platinum for summons or pretty much anything. Always shows up to your raid with no potions and needs money to get the Guildhall portal reset to the raid zone. Seems to either be trying to borrow plat or paying back a debt at all times. Constantly nags the raid leader about letting him be a looter.

The "Checking For Spawns" Guy
This guy is always worried about boss spawns. He is so compulsive in this area that he logs out after every mob is killed to "check on the spawns". The funny part is he usually never makes it to the actual mob killing because he has family stuff to do or kids to beat. He is often confused and/or overlaps with the AFK'er and the foreign guy.

The E-stud
This guy is as macho as it gets. He hits on everything resembling a female, asserting his ability to woo any lady, even the fictional ones. His favorite insult is the word "f4g" and proclaims regularly how easily he could whip you IRL. He makes subtle references to his intense workouts earilier in the day when he falters in a raid. And, when the raid is complete, he makes sure to reveal exactly how drunk he is going to get after he signs off, simply because he is just that good at life.

The E-Dater
Will hit on any girl in your guild or raid. He probably plays a lot with his chosen target, hanging out in battlegrounds with her, etc. Eventually he begins to feel a real connection happening, and is hurt when his feelings are not returned. Can be extremely hissy if you make fun of his e-life.

The Guy Listening to Music
The guy is always on vent, and always listening to music really loud. Whenever he speaks, you can't understand anything he's saying and produces some of the most awful noises in existence through your speakers or headphones. Insists that Unknown Band X is the best music ever and is shocked to hear that you've never heard of them or don't like them.

The Aussie
Doesn't play on your guilds raiding time window. Can't raid with you on weekdays. Has a funny accent that, if he overlaps with a few other characters, can be quite entertaining. He probably plays a class essential to your raid (like a Cleric) or else is extremely skilled at playing the game. The Aussie is generally a friendly, easy-going guy that rarely causes problems for the raid.

The Ignorant Looter
The guy in the raid that doesn't know his class and what gear he should have worth a damn. Frequent occurances are: rangers going in on shaman gear, shamans going in on ranger gear, and healers going in on casters gear. Officers can't tell them not to go in because it's "my DKP and I can spend it how I please".

The Officer Demander
The guy that most frequently says "I pay my 15 bucks a month and can play how I want." However, they make it known that they expect the officers to be completely responsible for how much fun they are having. He/she refers to the officers not as people but as working stiffs who live for the sole purpose of making everyone else in the guild happy. Frequently contradicts themselves, taking the side of whoever has a problem with the officers at any given time. Their demands are sometimes completely unexcusable, but they refuse to see that and just demand that it gets done so that they may enjoy the game. This person is never an officer but you can bet that if they were, nothing would ever be their fault.

The Ex-Guildie
This person has left your guild for whatever reason (usually because their present guild was a few bosses ahead) but still hangs out in the guild-only chat channels. At their best, these people can be entertaining and perhaps helpful by providing you with advice on encounters that they know. At their worst, they can be downright annoying by A. constantly reminding you of how leet their present guild is, B. insulting people in your guild and stating repeatedly how they're so glad they're out of your guild, or C. telling you that you're bound to wipe on a fight because that's not the way their guild does it.

The Former Member of Some Other Guild
Joined your guild because his guild sucked/didn't need him/doesn't raid/sucked. He'll have some good stories from his former raid, including how it took them 4 weeks to get down Ture. He insists that compared to that guild, your guild/raid is incredible... at least until he leaves your guild for someone else.

Ebay
Bought his account off of Ebay. He's probably in your raid because a) the guy who used to play the character was in the raid, or you're desperate. Expect to hear stuff like "Where's Anguish?" if the guy is coherent, which he probably isn't. You'll waste so much effort on teaching this guy how to play, only to find out that the lack of skill he'll bring to your raid makes you want to kill yourself.

The Mystery Girl
This is the girl that never says much but when she does she stops traffic. Everyone wonders if she is for real; she never gives out her age or her pictures. She is constantly spammed by guys wanting to know more about her because she won't act like an attention whore. She tends to be the unconventional girl, who plays a melee class and acts like "the guys" as much as possible, and tells people off when they get too personal.

The Emo
This person is the one in the raid whom if he isn't getting enough attention gets all sad and depressed. After awhile he will stop attacking altogether, and will just follow the crowd. If something isn't going his way, the whole raid knows about it. The females in the group will try to cheer him up. The males in the group will chuckle, and call him a pussy behind his back. Even when he wins loot hes inconsolably sad

The Server Asshole
This guy does anything he wants in any group that doesn't solely consist of his guild. He ninjas, creates drama on forums, ninjas some more, and then throws around weak personal insults like it's his job. He often uses excuses like "I pay 15 bucks a month to play this game, so I'll do whatever the hell I want." This person is doesn't care one bit about screwing everyone else around him over, as long as he himself has fun. Always uses weak/lame/just plain bad excuses to justify his actions. The only reason he still even raids is because he belongs to one of the top 3 guilds and is the officer of it.

The Chronic LD'er
This guy either has a horrible connection or some other computer related problem that will just not let him stay connected to EverQuest. He tends to be someone important like the puller or MT and as soon as you engage you hear someone say "Oh shit LD just crashed again." Always tends to get back in time to recieve loot, but if he doesn't, goes about how "Sony's !&$%ing servers are !&$%ing crap and they need to fix their !&$%-" At which point he's usualy LD'd again.

The Drama Queen
Tends to also overlap with The Gossip Queen and The Attention Junkie. This person is the major source of all drama in your guild ot the server in general. Everything that happens is a problem, s/he didn't get the item s/he wanted, didn't get to group with the person s/he wanted to, his/her "e-date" partner is upset with him/her (or TDQ is upset with the partner) and brings it up in guild/raid chat/Vent, and/or believes everyone (especially the GL and officers) is somehow alined against him/her. If he/she leaves the guild, expect a lot of drama to continue afterwards.

The Answer Guy
This guy/girl is always in vent, guild chat, raid chat, several other channels. If an issue arises, people go to this guy to discuss it (though not generally to gossip, though many times the Answer Guy can be confused for the Gossip Queen). This guy lives on Lucy and Allakhazam. He trolls the guild forums (both his guild and other guilds) and EQ forums for strats. Most times this player is not an officer, but the officers may listen to this player, and may possibly use his suggestions. Because of this he feels he has some sort of latent power with the officers that doesnt really exist. He tends to be outspoken whenever he feels he has found an answer to a problem, a quest, or what loot may drop. A common combination is The Answer Guy and The Diplomat.

The Diplomat
He/She is very adept (or thinks they are) at mitigating arguments and attempts to ensure that the survivability of that particular raid, or of the guild is paramount to all else. He may suggest that all players re-spec for specific encounters to ensure maximum survivability. He attempts to approach guild or raid issues with an open mind and infinite patience. He is who players come to when they need to discuss guild issues. On rare occasions he is known to snap at players that are having an open dispute in vent to quiet down or take it elsewhere, or attempts to cut them off with an all encompassing "feel good" remark (Sometimes overlaps with The Optimist). A modification of this role is the Impatient Diplomat, whereas all previous points have an edge, that, while getting the job done, sometimes overlap with The Jackass. The person in this position is often an Officer.

The Opinionator
If an opinion can exist (or even if it cant) on a subject, this guy has it. (IE: Hatchett hits hard. Oh, but not as hard as OMM). He many times overlaps with the Ex-Guildie or The "Pro", although his opinions are generally correct, they are often entirely without context in a given situation. He thinks he knows what items should go to what classes in accordance with how that class is to be played. He may also be one of those who has the audacity to tell another class how to play. This position occasionally can be confused, or more frequently, overlap with The Answer Guy.'

The Insomniac/No-Lifer/Chameleon
No one understands it, but for some reason, this guy is ALWAYS on. Login at 6AM he is on, login at Noon or Midnight and he is on. In fact, if this person were NOT logged in, you'd be afraid your guild had disbanded or that he dropped dead at his keyboard. He claims to have a personal life and will occasionally assume the roll of The E-Stud while attempting to proclaim is real life exploits, although he never seems to be logged off long enough to actually have done them. He is generally quiet in vent or guild chat, unless he is temporarily assuming an alternating roll (which happens often). Many times this player also overlaps the He of 1,000 alts position. Because of his constant presence he may have been given the roll of an officer.

The RP'er
Sure its a PVE game, but this guy stays in character ALL THE TIME. maybe his character hates gnomes, and refuses to be in the same group as them. he undoubtably has macros with emotes attached to all his spells "/e lets hell's fury rain down upon his pathetic enemies." he does know his class, and isn't a bad raider either, but you'll find him walking everywhere, in non-raid gear and no weapons equipped.